My Heart

I walk around
happy and
smiley and
enjoying life.

and that's
no lie,
any of it.

yet my heart,
my heart is hurting,
it's hurting because of
feelingsit has strained to
conceal,hide away.

it cries,
even when I am not
crying, my heart is crying,
it is hurting,
and trying to avoid the pain
it knows speaking these feelings
to him would bring.


my hear feels like
a zombie sometimes,
alive yet checking out
sometimes.

my and I know
wgat beeds to be
done, yet we are both scared
of it.